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The Adam Carolla Show

Welcome to the Adam Carolla Podcast! The new home for the rantings and ravings of Adam Carolla, and with Bald Bryan on sound effects. Check it out Adam hangs out with some his pals, like: Larry Miller, David Allen Grier, Dr. Drew Pinksy, Dana Gould, Doug Benson, and many, many more.
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Click Here for Take a Knee Episodes

In addition to the latest 20 episodes for FREE you can now dig into the Adam Carolla Archives. Listen to any show going back to the first podcast on February 23, 2009. Pricing guidelines below. Any Mylibsyn subscription plan allows access to the ENTIRE back catalog. Get it on with some classic Carolla.
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Jul 16, 2010

A special all Mel Gibson version of This Week in This Week with the best moments of the crew breaking down Mel's most memorable lines.

Jul 15, 2010

Adam has a few words with Donny and Sandy about his coffee tasting like Spaghetti-O’s this morning. Adam always complains about dirty dishes in the workplace, but realizes now this is his workplace. Teresa is excited about the upcoming Megan’s Law game, and also to play the latest Mel Gibson audio. Adam says it’s unfair to record a conversation when the other person doesn’t know, and wonders why there aren’t social boundaries anymore. He and Teresa talk about the impact of technology and the internet, but Adam suggests that Mel doesn’t necessarily have to make an apology to the public.

 

Anderson comes into the studio, Adam’s former Engineer at Loveline, and now co-host of The Film Vault. Adam takes a series of listener calls for Made Up Movie. You call in with fake titles, and everyone rolls with it to create a story. This week the plots vary from a Twitter romantic comedy to an epic sports movie project for Taylor Lautner.

 

At last the Megan’s Law Awards are presented. Prior to recording, everyone handed over their addresses, which were researched online since sex offenders must register their information. Dawson counts down the Top 10 staff members who have the most sex offenders living within one mile of them.

 

After the winner is named, Teresa jumps into the last part of the news, which opens with a story about a sex offender. A middle school teacher accused of having child pornography on his computer has turned himself in. Everyone makes fun of the former teacher’s online alias, and also wonder why he’d be so dumb as to turn in the computer to the very school he worked at.

 

Teresa then talks about her obsession with The Guinness Book of World Records. Adam says the only reason it was even remotely exciting as kids was because there was nothing else to do. Still, Adam chimes in with several of his favorite record holders along with Teresa, though he says he doubts children of future generations will understand the book’s appeal.

 

Teresa says she read a story about a woman with gigantism that reminded her of the book. Tanya Angus was just a normal girl in her early twenties, but all of a sudden she noticed bizarre growth spurts throughout her body. 10 years later the changes are massive. Previous attempts to help her were unsuccessful, and at this point it is difficult to travel outside of her hometown. Teresa reports that another surgery will take place later this month.

 

Not wanting to end the show on a down note, they talk about Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem being officially married. Bald Bryan asks if this new couple, based on talent and income, is now the biggest celebrity power couple. Teresa proposes it could be a great topic for a future Film Vault episode.

 

To hear any and all episodes, download The Film Vault here on the home site. Or subscribe on iTunes. 

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Production Engineer: Logan Moy

Search: Katie Levine

Build and Edit: Katie Levine 

Phones: Brian Myer

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 14, 2010

At the top of the show, Adam is trying to explain the dry walling process to Teresa. Huell Howser audio clips are dropped in to comment on the thrilling conversation. More audio has been leaked from Mel Gibson's recent rants, and Adam wonders what the world's reaction would be if we found out Mel had a tumor that was affecting his behavior. They talk about people who get blackout drunk, and listen to audio of Whoopi Goldberg defending Mel and saying that he's not really a racist. Adam says we're getting an itchy trigger finger calling people racist, and he wants to make a distinction between people who are talking smack and people who are actually acting on their thoughts.

 

Stephen Prothero comes on the line to talk about his new book, 'God Is Not One.' When Adam asks him his thoughts on religion, Stephen says that he does not adhere to one particular belief system, and is indeed intrigued by the world's many traditions. Adam finds a way to compare religious beliefs to watching old episodes of Saturday Night Live. They talk a bit more about the root of today's current religious arguments, and Adam says that it doesn't work when everyone has their own beliefs. Before Stephen signs off, he takes a few moments to defend the positive attributes of religion that people often overlook.

 

Adam's old friend Rob Barnett comes in studio, and Adam says that Rob is the one who helped him land his radio job replacing Howard Stern. They talk about how Howard would have reacted had he still been involved with terrestrial radio during this economy, and Rob talks about his dislike of satellite radio. He essentially says that programmers 'stopped putting a focus on talent,' and instead they should 'hire talent and let them do what they want to do'.

 

So Rob broke away from the radio industry and started mydamnchannel.com. Adam compares the project to his own podcast, only the website is more of a video presentation than audio. They go on to talk about how the talk show system appeals to the lowest common denominator, and radio is very much the same way. Adam recalls being backstage at a Chicago morning show and the hosts were unable to just 'roll with it'. Rob points out that it's hard work to maintain a show, and he talks about his roots working with a partner to figure out how to get fans and attract advertisers.

 

Teresa brings up the news that New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner passed away. Adam says, 'I'll miss the mock-turtlenecks and blazers.' They also talk about John Stamos filing an extortion case against an underage girl who threatened to release pictures of him doing cocaine. They crack wise about Full House and also talk about the Alanis Morisette-Dave Coulier relationship.

 

Inmates at Lindsay Lohan's jail all say they want a piece of her. Everyone in the room predicts that they won't actually let Lohan into the general population. We find out a bit more about gay inmate politics, and Adam talks about creative prisoners making strap-ons. The final news story involves a guy settling a domestic dispute by rubbing a sandwich into his wife's face, and this reminds Adam of the times when Donny would rub pie into the faces of the women that dumped him. Donny jumps on the mic to defend that it wasn't 'every girl,' and Adam admits to picking the pie off the sidewalk so he could eat it.

 

To hear more from Rob, check out MyDamnChannel.com. And don't forget to pick up Stephen Prothero's new book God is Not One. Or follow him on Twitter @Sprothero

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Production Engineer: Logan Moy

Search: Katie Levine 

Build and Edit: Katie Levine 

Phones: Chris Laxamana

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 13, 2010

Bald Bryan is back, and there’s a busy show up ahead. The opening news stories revolve around cases of domestic abuse. First, a brief discussion about the tragic homicides in New Mexico. Then, Teresa plays several clips from Mel Gibson’s latest leaked audio. Adam ‘[thinks] this is good for Mel. He’s now officially insane. All the things he’s said before are now seen through the prism of a madman.’ Teresa asks if there’s anything more maddening than arguing with someone who doesn’t participate in the argument. Later they surmise that Mel may be on human growth hormones.

 

Larry Miller comes into the studio, and Adam asks his opinions on the Mel Gibson issue. Larry suggests that Mel is one of the most popular celebrities in the world, he should have juts gotten on a boat with eight girls and ridden off into the sunset. The group listens to more of the audio, and Teresa points out further drama involving Oksana’s dentist who didn’t report the alleged domestic abuse. To round out Larry’s visit, he and Adam play a round of Hypotethetical Road Trips.

 

Then director Jay Duplass sits down. He talks about his new film Cyrus, and how he and his brother originally wrote the script together. Adam wants to know more about producing the film, and Jay goes on to talk about having one of his previous films going to Sundance. Both John C. Reily and Jonah Hill (stars of the film) were massive fans of he and his brother’s previous work, and so the film just came together. Jay talks about his early stages breaking into Hollywood, and since their film is mostly improvised, he and Adam discuss ‘the purity of the first take.’

 

Teresa compliments the art direction of the film, and also the costumes. Jay talks about shooting the film on a new high-end digital camera, and suggests that actors can tell their productions are filmed in a different ways than most movies. Jay says, ‘it’s just about continuing doing what we like to do,’ and talks about his early influence from The Coen Brothers.

 

In the last part of the news, Teresa talks about a couple celebrities dealing with prison time. Roman Polanski has recently been released from house arrest, and is free to travel anywhere in the world, so long as he’s not in a country with an expedition agreement with the US. Adam says we need to enforce our laws, and doesn’t understand why we can’t just jump into France or Switzerland and go grab him. Jay points out the Manson murders, and Teresa notes how your allegiance starts to shift. Another news story deals with Lindsay Lohan concerned about her upcoming jail time, and also some GLAAD complaints against The View. The final stories involves Harvey Pekar’s recent death, and Jay admits he’s obsessed with Paul Giamatti, the actor who portrayed him in the film American Splendor. Adam says maybe he’ll appear in Jay’s next film, and wishes him well in the future.

 

Check out the new film ‘Cyrus’, in theaters now.

 

And don’t forget to visit Larrymillerhumor.com. Or see Larry perform live at The Irvine Improv July 22-24th

 

The Adam Carolla Podcast will be live at The Roosevelt Hotel, Saturday July 31st

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje
Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons
Writer: Mike Lynch
Audio: Mike Dawson
Production Engineer: Logan Moy

Search: Chris Laxamana

Build and Edit: Katie Levine
Phones: Brian Myer
Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 12, 2010

Adam opens the show talking about how he just got back from San Jose. He wanted to take a later flight so he could finish writing his book, and ended up barely making his flight because he was stuck behind someone who refused to turn at the left turn light. Adam questions the kind of people who aren't rushing to get to the airport. Adam also complains more about airport security, and thinks it's ridiculous that all of the different airports have different rules.

 

After speaking a bit more about doing the live show in San Jose, Teresa jumps into the news and plays the audio clip of Mel Gibson's racial rant. After hearing it, Adam says 'you have to admire the man's passion,' but Teresa says the recording is 'beyond sexist.'  They compare it to the Alec Baldwin voicemail, but they say it's actually worse. They also point out that Mel's career may now be in trouble, and he should have gotten in front of the news the way that Letterman was able to do.

 

Further news stories involve Spain winning the world cup, and also winning records for most yellow cards in a world cup game -- in fact it doubled the old record. Adam recalls the time he saw the Spain crowd was being racist and making monkey noises at the black players on the British team. He jokes that the win couldn't have gone to a nicer team. The last news story deals with a woman whose death had to do with sexual excitement. Adam says, 'she died doing what she loved,' and wonders why we have to disclose all of this raunchy information.

 

And speaking of raunchy information, Mike Lynch (still filling in for Bald Bryan) digs up a couple more Rich Banks songs that were deemed too hot for radio. At this point, Adam's guests arrive to talk briefly about their famous Obama Girl video. Adam asks them how they make money from viral videos, and they said that mostly it just comes from ad sales. Since the election was a couple years ago, they've now been focusing on music parodies. 

 

Adam takes a few calls for a segment called Tales from the Cheap, where essentially you call in with stories of your parents being cheap. One man's grandma warmed up tampons that had been rained on just so her daughter could use them. Another was forced to drink Tang out of a mustard bottle, and a final caller had to pay for cheese on his burgers cause his dad wouldn't spare the dime. Adam asks about what kind of bullshit our parents were trying to pull, and wonders if all the extra calories burned was worth it.

 

Jumping back into the news, Jennifer Anniston just got a new puppy. Also there have were a couple celebrity weddings over the weekend, (Carrie Underwood and Martin Lawrence), and Teresa talks about two Pennsylvania burglars with unusual goals in mind. Finally, Dinah Lohan is in the news again defending her daughter's jail sentence. She says that she's angry with the system, and Adam concludes 'she's the monster who created the monster.'

 

To hear more from our guests, check out their videos at either of the following sites:

http://www.youtube.com/barelypolitical

http://www.barelypolitical.com

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Production Engineer: Logan Moy

Search: Katie Levine

Build and Edit: Logan Moy

Phones: Katie Levine

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 9, 2010

Writer Mike Lynch is filling in for Bald Bryan today. Adam explains that at one point he worked the sound board, but when he went on his honeymoon, Bryan took over. Now he's reclaiming his rightful place on the SFX board, and he plays several parody songs that he and Dick Banks wrote together once Bryan took over the job.

 

The top news story involves LeBron James deciding to go to Miami next season. Teresa teases Adam about his comments that tall people don't live as long, and they are reminded of their very tall guest Brad Garrett, who was on the show last night. Moving forward, Mel Gibson is in deep water again for several bigoted remarks about latinos, and Adam wonders if maybe in Australian culture, these horrible words don't mean the same thing. Adam concludes that we are actually not as racist in the US as they are in other places in the world, and they all wonder if people will continue to see his movies.

 

After some brief conversation about the Emmy nominations, the guys from Schmoes Know movie reviews return to offer their thoughts on various summer blockbusters. Adam wants to know more about the epic flop of Knight and Day, but the guys say that the failure is not the actor's fault. They also talk about The Last Airbender, and conclude that this could be one of the worst summers for movies ever. There are some bright lights on the horizon, and Adam can't wait to have a marijuana medstrip and go see The Expendables with ESPN's Sports Guy Bill Simmons.

 

Adam takes several calls for a round of Mr. Brightside. One guy recently hit a bum with his car, and another is bummed that he's had to move from San Diego to Kentucky. Another caller is upset that he's about to become a radio co-host with Danny Bonaduce, and the final caller owes a quarter of a million in back-taxes. Adam tries his best to make everyone feel better about their current situations.

 

The last part of the news deals with Lindsay Lohan selling her first post-jail interview. Apparently she won't take less than $1 million, and Adam thinks it's because she's broke. Even though she gets paid to make club appearances, that's not enough to pay the bills. The Schmoes Knows guys offer their thoughts on the new Linda Lovelace biopic that she will be starring in, and before they wrap up the show, Teresa jumps into a double-round of Germany or Florida.

 

To see the Schmoes Know film reviews, visit their page at: http://www.youtube.com/schmoesknow

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Production Engineer: Logan Moy

Search: Katie Levine

Build and Edit: Katie Levine 

Phones: Brian Myer

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 8, 2010

After talking about our cultural differences with Guatemala, Teresa jumps into the news. Lonnie Franklin, Jr. is also known as the Grim Sleeper, and has allegedly murdered at least 10 hookers. Adam says this is why you don't give your kid a Jr., and also says that the killer gives mechanics a bad name. The DNA was gathered from a discarded slice of pizza, and Adam says, 'Information won't rob us of our civil liberties, unless we did something wrong.' He talks about the evolution of information technology through sports, and Teresa agrees that DNA evidence mostly just exonerates people.

 

Michael Lohan is in the news again, this time for causing problems at a Saddle Ranch restaurant. Adam talks about how Lohan is a bit of a fame whore, which transitions into a discussion about recent podcast guest and former Bachelor star Jake Pavelka. His ex-girlfriend recently whored herself out on TV, just to say that Jake is a fame whore. Other news stories involve Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough.

 

When Brad Garrett comes into the studio, Adam talks about his recent experience being on 'Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader.' When Adam first agreed to do the show, the producers sent him a disc to watch as an example, and it happened to be Brad's episode. They both agreed that it was fun to do the show, but secretly Adam was terrified of freezing up on an easy question. Brad jokes that he got to pick the kids who helped feed him the answers.

 

They talk a bit about the Brad Garrett Comedy Club, which just opened at the Tropicana Hotel in Las Vegas. He and Adam talk about doing standup, doing impressions, and also working with Ray Ramano. Brad is clearly very happy that Ray continues to have success on TV, and Brad is also experiencing success on his show 'Til Death'. Brad says he misses and loves stand-up, and it's been great designing his own comedy space and watching new performers blow everyone away.

 

After a few rounds of Hobo Power, the show jumps into the rest of the news. LeBron James and his mother are being sued for allegedly covering up the identity of his natural born father. The man claims that he impregnated LeBron's mom when she was 15, and slowly put the pieces together. No one on the show thinks they look related.

 

At the end of the show, Brad teases Teresa about her own Hobo power, and the conversation turns to sex and marriage. Adam says that women shouldn't fake their orgasms every time, and Brad flirts with Teresa about her own sexual habits. He also talks a bit about his previous marriage and divorce, and how it's always rough on the kids. Wrapping up the sex talk, the final news story involves a Dutch porn star who's offered blowjobs to all her Twitter followers if Netherlands wins the World Cup.

 

See Brad Garrett perform monthly at his new venue at The Tropicana: The Brad Garrett Comedy Club.

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Production Engineer: Logan Moy

Search: Chris Laxamana

Build and Edit: Chris Laxamana

Phones: Brian Myer

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 7, 2010

 

Coming back from the long weekend, Adam talks about how much he actually enjoys going to the beach. He talks a bit about going to Jimmy Kimmel’s 4th of July party, and both he and Teresa love how the lower-income areas usually set off the fireworks before it even gets dark. Adam also talks about fireworks during soccer games, and discusses his love for ESPN’s 30-for-30 series. 

 

The news goes into a series of stories revolving around troubled relationships. There’s Terri Horman, the woman who allegedly hired someone to kill her husband, and then there’s Jake and Vienna, arguing on national television during an emotional breakup. They also talk about Jesse James’ ex wife Janine trying to get custody of their kids, and the story of a 91-year-old widow who exhumed and lived with the corpses of her husband and sister.

 

Dr. Drew steps in the studio just in time to talk about Lindsay Lohan. She’s recently been sentenced to 90 days in jail, and 90 days of treatment. Dr. Drew talks about addicts who just aren’t into recovering, and agrees with both the judge’s decision, and the spirit in which the sentence was given. He says that jail can be helpful, but doesn’t necessarily think it will be enough in Lindsay’s case. Reminding Adam of his old MTV days, he recalls the time he and Dr. Drew had to fight for bleacher seats at the MTV movie awards.

 

Teresa asks about casting rumors for the next season of Celebrity Rehab. Dr. Drew says he is on call to start the next season at any time, but even he is unaware of who is actually going to be cast. Adam and Dr. Drew then spend some time talking about their own families. Dr. Drew is worried about his wife’s pending empty nest system, and Adam continues to show concern over his daughter growing up to hate him. Dr. Drew is fascinated by Adam’s relationship with his kids, and recalls the time his daughter faked a poo-poo to get out of a hug.

 

Towards the end of the podcast, Adam and Dr. Drew take listener calls to give relationship advice. One caller noticed the girl he’s dating has been shown in an ‘ex-girlfriends’ porn website. Another is concerned about being a compulsive liar. Adam talks about his inability to lie growing up, and hails the glory of medical marijuana strips. Finally, a caller suggests he has a problem dating religious women, and Adam is reminded that cult leaders do it to bang hot chicks.

 

Listen to Dr. Drew regularly on Loveline, and see him appearing as the doctor on MTV’s Warren the Ape. You can also follow him on twitter @DrDrew

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Search: Katie Levine

Build and Edit: Chris Laxamana

Phones: Brian Meyer

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

 

Jul 6, 2010

A sound cue from Bald Bryan right at the top of show gets Adam talking about whether or not George Jetson is gay. They get Isaac Hayes take on the situation, and Adam does his best to stand up for straight guys without coming off as being uptight. Teresa then jumps into the news and talks about a series of older women who have recently experienced problems after giving birth at such an old age.

 

The next news story deals with a homeless man named Darrell Bess who was found naked with stolen cheese. Apparently he also had DVDs on him as well, and Adam talks about how poor people have to work ridiculously hard to fuel their drug habits. It reminds him of his dad checking old music records out at the library. He wonders if all the back and forth effort was worth it, and couldn’t he have just bought it once? Playing a track from Dion Warwick, Adam recalls a rough drive home from Las Vegas when his girlfriend broke up with him.

 

A cease and desist case has been brought against ThinkGeek.com for claiming that Unicorn Meat is the other white meat. Think Geek issued a very sarcastic response, which Teresa gleefully reads out loud. And speaking of legal issues, Michael Douglas is in the news because his ex-wife is demanding profits from the new Wall Street movie that’s coming out. It’s really a question of whether or not a sequel is the same thing as a spinoff, and Adam fears that this case is going to open a can of worms in the entertainment industry.

 

Missy Suicide comes into the studio to talk about SuicideGirls.com. The website features pin-up style photos of girls who ‘choose to commit social suicide and not fit in.’ Missy got started in 2001 after realizing the girls with the most personality were really the most beautiful. She talks about marketing the idea, comparing it to burlesque star Betty Page, and also talks about filming the new reality horror movie Suicide Girls Must Die.

 

Before the final section of news, Adam and Teresa take several calls for a few rounds of Made-Up Movie. Basically you call in with a fake movie title, and everyone riffs on it to create a story. Along the way, they create new vehicles for actors like Ice Cube, Carlos Mencia, and Reese Witherspoon. Afteward, Adam spends a long time talking about what a doofus Jon Gosselin is for getting a huge tattoo on his back, and everyone jokes about the Kmart Shoplifter who stole 44 pairs of underwear.

 

They talk about Rob Lowe’s memoir that’s coming out, which claims that he’s been an actor for 40 years. Adam doesn’t like when they say that and you’re only 42 years old. You can’t say you’ve been acting since you were two if you were just held on stage as an infant. The final news story deals with Bachelor star Jake Pavelka, who was recently on the podcast. Adam says he’s a nice guy, but questions the type of person who claims they want to find love, then reveals they’re just trying to further their acting career.

 

Suicide Girls Must Die is out now, and check out all the great pictures on SuicideGirls.com

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje
Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons
Writer: Mike Lynch
Audio: Mike Dawson
Search: Logan Moy

Build and Edit: Katie Levine

Phones: Katie Levine

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 5, 2010

Teresa’s got a drink in her hand, and Bryan is at the ready with the sound effects. Adam immediately jumps into what a white town Irvine is. The people at the gas station trust you with your credit cards, and even the bathroom was clean! Adam gets in a few rounds of What Can’t Adam Complain About, and Teresa reveals an interesting bathroom habit she has for her first dates. Later they talk with Isaac Hayes about the afterlife.

 

The top news story is Mel Gibson’s latest racial slur. His baby mama Oksana Grigorieva has audio of various racial rants, and also threats of him burning his house down. Adam thinks it’s hilarious when people weave insults into their backhanded compliments. Either way, the NAACP is not accepting an apology. When Adam asks where Danny Glover comes down on all this, Bryan says he’s too old for this shit.

 

After a story about Tori Spelling’s husband, Dana Gould comes onto the program and talks about his recent trip to China. He says that there is a one-child policy there that heavily favors boys, so they adopted a baby girl. Dana talks about the weirdest thing he saw in the city, and also talks about how his daughters are reacting to the newest member of their family. Dana also says that ‘Asian chicks are off limits now.’ Wiping his new daughter’s poop, he can only see the same image on the women he sees on the street. The boys also crack wise about homeless dogs and transvestites.

 

For a segment of Huell’s Jewels, the whole gang does running commentary while clips from Huell Howser’s PBS program plays in the background. Between clips, they pause and talk about what they just saw. Most of the conversations on the show itself are painfully boring, but everyone has a great time tossing out jokes about rocks you can lick, and the Bagdad Cafe.

 

Teresa attempts to do the second bit of the news, but Dana and Adam keep jumping in with chauvinistic jokes and comments about Elena Kagan’s confirmation process (‘not jerkable’). Eventually we hear the story of Germany man on a train arrested for having an Adolf Hitler ringtone, but somehow they go off topic and end up talking about porn and accidental ‘mangasms’.

 

The last set of news stories deals with a judge in Ohio who got mad at a man for spitting on his jury. He punished him by forcing him to wear a diaper and mosquito net over his face. Teresa next news story involves the sale of an interesting looking couch, but Adam explains he does not want a used, ‘fully functional’ vagina couch. Adam recalls the old days when people would just sell normal shit. 

 

They talk about the fact that Tiger Woods is about to be single again, and even though he and his wife had a prenup, speculations of how much money Elin Woods will get in the divorce are sky high. The final news story revolves around Sean Penn’s new movie about a surfer who quit his job and took his kids surfing around the world. Dana is already very familiar with the story, and says it’s exactly like Sean’s last movie, Into the Wild.

 

To hear more from Dana Gould, visit his website at: www.danagould.com 

Or follow him on Twitter @DanaJGould

 

As always, Bryan is at www.aninconvenienttumor.com

And Teresa is at www.exploitingmybaby.com

 

 

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje

Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons

Writer: Mike Lynch

Audio: Mike Dawson

Search: Logan Moy

Build and Edit: Katie Levine

Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Jul 2, 2010
This Week in This Week:
 -Adam talks about his trouble while Tivo'ing Entourage
 -Guest Funny Dave Dameshek asked the crew about whether they believe in heaven and hell.
 -Comedian Rich Shydner from the movie "I Am Comic" talks about selling comedy to Jeff Foxworthy
 -Guests Dietrich Bader and his wife Dulcy sit in for a round of Totally Topical Tivo Trivia Time Today
 -Adam shares his thoughts on the Supreme Court nomination hearings.
 -Adam talks about his troubles with daughter Natalia and the history of the Carolla women and their dads.
 -Alcoa presents "Definitely Not a Jew"
 -Adam talks about more trouble with Natalia.
Jul 1, 2010
Bryan isn't feeling so great after another round of chemo. It reminds Adam of the time he had a yeast infection and had to go to the Santa Monica free clinic. He says the place was staffed with 'angry lesbians [who think] your junk is the enemy.' Teresa says the clinic on Vermont is even worse. Adam says he's going to have an uncomfortable conversation with his son to warn him about the dangers of heroin and lube.

Adam recalls a conversation he had with recent guest Diedrich Bader about who has the better Trader Joes. Diedrich also asked Adam what the name of his kids' school is, but Adam had no idea. It sends him off on a rant about how he shouldn't have to know the name of the school since he's paying for it. Teresa also points out that it's ridiculous that we have to participate even though we're paying, and she mentions a Super Freakonomics story that blames our bad school systems on feminism.

Jumping into the news, Elena Kagan is already being challenged while she's being sworn in as a Supreme Court Justice. One particular female senator clearly didn't have a question prepared, and attempted a joke about the Twilight series. Adam says that all these politicians need to realize 'you're not funny, keep it brief, stick to the business at hand.' He also points out that the Twilight series is the 'Biggest cop-out in the world … with werewolves, we're ripping off two movies now.'

Teresa recalls Adam's slogan for prevention of STDs in Africa: 'Cum on the tits.' She says there's a new South Africa rape prevention device for women that essentially works like a female condom with spikes. Once a man is hit with it, there's no way to remove the teeth without going to a doctor, at which point they'll be arrested. Adam thinks it's a good idea, but is worried that the rapists will counter with a Kevlar condom. And speaking of sexual abuse, the final news story revolves around Ferris Bueller star Jeffrey Jones, back in the news again for forgetting to register as a sex offender.

Hot Hot Heat is brought in studio, and right off the bat Adam asks if they're Canadian. They talk a little bit about decriminalizing marijuana, and then Adam asks the band about how they formed. They go into more detail about stories on the road, particularly the state of the bathrooms while on tour. It reminds Adam of the time he revoked podcast announcer Dawson's bathroom privileges for peeing on the toilet seat when two urinals were clearly open.

The band goes into why it took so long to make their newest album, Future Breeds. Apparently they were unsatisfied with their label, and so they decided to build their own studio and produce the album on their own. Adam draws comparisons to the Radiohead self-released album, and also to his own podcasting career and how he would never want to go back to radio. Hot Hot Heat refers to this type of independent spirit as 'Freedom and Rebellion.' 

Adam asks the band something he's never asked another band before: do you think you're better than other bands? Overall, the band seems unconcerned with how they compare, and instead are just focusing on their own music and reaching 'that meditative state on stage.' They also talk about bands they've opened for that have really impressed them, like Queens of the Stone Age or Modest Mouse. Adam says he saw Third Eye Blind live, not so great. Wrapping up the show, Adam and HHH exchange brilliant ideas: if the band will cover Focus by Hocus Pocus, Adam will record a commentary track for The Room.

Hot Hot Heat will be going back on tour in August. In the meantime, grab their new album Future Breeds, and find out more information at: www.hothotheat.com


Executive Producer: Donny Misraje
Producer: Angie Fitzsimmons
Writer: Mike Lynch
Audio: Mike Dawson
Search: Logan Moy
Build and Edit: Katie Levine
Phones: Brian Myer
Show Summary: Matt Fondiler
May 30, 2010

Adam welcomes Frances Callier and Angela Shelton to the studio, the comedy duo also known as Frangela. They regularly appear on VH1’s Best Week Ever, and Adam marvels at their ability to work together. He says, ‘Comedians hate other comedians. Women hate bitches. Women of color may hate each other even more.’ They say they’re friends first, ‘thick as thieves.’ They met in Second City, Chicago, an area well known for improv. To sum it up nicely, Frances says, ‘Nothing is more painful than bad improv.’ They talk about people who preplan their improv and deny every offer given to them. Adam calls it ‘comedy polio’ and compares it to having a shitty dance partner. Adam starts talking in ‘Sassy Urban,’ and soon they start talking about the 1970s classic show ‘What’s Happening!!’ Adam dissects each character and laughs about the cameo The Doobie Brothers make in season 4. Adam mentions previous guest Michael Jai White, and the girls laugh about their ‘very urban’ crushes on Billy Joel and Bob Newhart. Francis and Angela go through their early experiences being separated and trying to make it in LA. Adam compares it to living with Donny, and he flashes back to his battlecry of ‘clean or leave’ to any ladies staying in their apartment. It reminds him of his days working at McDonalds, working his ass off in leather shoes and burning the BigMac buns. Soon the conversation moves to a discussion of a utopian world with one globe and no borders. Adam says we need to stop shipping food to Africa and start sending condoms instead. He also says, ‘we’re way too into the sanctity of life,’ and decides we should ‘bulldoze all those assholes’ that are stopping us from creating a world where ‘everyone takes care of their own shit.’ They talk about the people who don’t do such a great job raising their kids, and he ties it into the Menendez Brothers case. All the talk about intra-family murder reminds him of the Mafia and the John Goti crime syndicate, and the conversation wraps up nicely while discussing the idea of wanting to be famous and ‘being a fame whore for any reason.’ Adam explains how ten years ago you wouldn’t go on Oprah to announce something that will bring you shame. ‘Now we embrace it, I don’t get it.’ You can catch Francis Callier’s voice every week on The Cleveland Show, or also both Francis and Angela via podcast on ‘The Week According to Frangela’. Check out their website: Frangela.com Produced: Beth Einhorn Audio: Katie Levine Search: Logan Moy Build and Edit: Logan Moy Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

May 28, 2010

Adam welcomes the stars of youtube sensation Schmoes Know to the podcast. The guys are here to talk about summer blockbusters, and Adam immediately jumps into fake enthusiasm for the release of Marmaduke. He tells a hilarious story about getting Sonny to recognize Owen Wilson’s voice in a commercial, and Adam makes some predictions about various scenes that will likely appear in the movie. The Shmoes Know guys say they review a lot of movies based on viewer choice, in addition to all the major releases. They’ve also started reviewing trailers, and you can check all the videos out at youtube.com/schmoesknow. They say the trailer for MacGruber is actually pretty decent (The R-Rated trailer at least), and Adam admits it’s a good genre the skewer. They also get into a discussion comparing Pixar films to Dreamworks animation, and Adam goes on a side jag about popcorn-proof 3D glasses. Adam says, ‘we have to make a distinction between movies you need to see in the theater, and movies you don’t need to see in the theaters.’ Shmoes Know says that they’re sure to tell viewers to rush out and see certain movies. Something like Iron Man 2 or How To Train Your Dragon, you definitely want to experience in the cinema. They also speak a little bit more about trailers, and Adam warns that trailers where they don’t actually show footage from the film ‘is a marker for ‘this movie sucks.’’ Unfortunately someone in the group has not seen Showgirls, and so Adam recreates one of the more controversial scenes in the film. He does all of this with the visual of Yanni acting in the scene, and the guys go on a tangent about needing a Mustache hall of fame. Adam spends some time defending the new Sex and the City movie, however he says the latest Indiana Jones had no excuse. The guys also talk about the new Karate Kid, and Adam makes a claim that Will Smith and his family are taking all the good white roles. They speak about comic book movies, the terrible new Ashton Kutcher movie, and why he thinks Katherine Hiegel is on the exact same career trajectory as Kate Hudson. In the end, they say that it all ‘keeps coming down to right director, right writing.’ They wrap up by excitedly talking about the new Stallone movie, The Expendables. Adam says that, as a writer, Stallone is terrible. ‘His dialogue is out of a bad textbook—‘I don’t know who to trust anymore’ ‘I used to know you’… if you saw it on a page, you’d say ‘wow this is really shitty.’’ The Shmoes Know guys say they don’t care about the dialogue, just the explosions. Check out more Shmoes Knows reviews at: www.Youtube.com/schmoesknow www.Facebook.com/schmoesknow

May 27, 2010

Adam welcomes CEO of Watchmojo.com Ashkan Karbasfrooshan to the show, calling in via Skype from Montreal, Canada. He describes his website as being like about.com, but in video format—the site has almost 6,000 short form videos on every topic imaginary. ‘You name it, we probably have a video on it’. Adam and Ash discuss how more and more consumers are switching to the internet, and that there’s actually been a threefold growth in the last 18 months to prove this. Adam marvels how you used to go into the other room if you needed to check something on the internet, but now that everything is being combined, we’re sort of right on the border of not having to leave the room anymore. Adam says ‘we’re really gonna kick into high gear over the next five years I imagine.’ Ash breaks everything down to a dichotomy between those who embrace the new media and those who don’t. Adam also talks about the ability to fast forward through commercials, and so advertisers need to find a way to incorporate their products directly into the show. He also says that advertisers have to have more compelling ads. He points out that he stopped for a Dos Equis commercial because he genuinely likes those ads. Ash says, ‘you can’t really rationalize advertising,’ and gives Vanity Fair as an example since they seem to survive solely on social relevance. It reminds Adam of seeing magazines at the hair salon, and he complains that they never have magazines for guys. ‘Don’t dudes get their haircuts??’ Adam asks Ash about Montreal and he says it’s a great city like San Francisco, and very European. He says in general that people are not quite as business oriented in Montreal as they are in the US, and Adam wants to know more about why they aren’t as motivated. Ash mentions Canada’s smaller population and says that it’s ‘in your DNA in the States to compete.’ Adam agrees, saying ‘everybody in the United States is a hustler,’ but he doesn’t mean it in a bad way. Ash says that on average, if you took 100 of each culture, Canadians are not going to be hustlers the way Americans are—again, not in a bad way. He talks about selling his first company to Newscorp, and now that watchmojo.com is taking off, Canadian companies are worried that he’ll go with an American company again. Whenever he asks them what they have to offer, they say nothing. Adam invites Ash to come visit in person next time he comes to LA, but in the meantime definitely check out watchmojo.com. Produced: Donny Misraje Audio: Katie Levine Search: Logan Moy Build and Edit: Katie Levine Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

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